Tuesday, November 8, 2011


It's almost that time again.  Christmas. 

Christmas had always meant 'family' to me.  It was a time to be spent with family, where presents were given and received.  By family.  When my Pop was alive, he ALWAYS arrived with Red Tulip after dinner mints (the thin square ones in the paper sleeve) for everyone and Tweed perfume for Mum.  She didn't like Tweed perfume, but she never told him that and he continued to buy it.  He would also have a packet or two of Mackintosh's Toffee De Luxe.

The Egg & Cream ones were my favourite.  I used to leave the Coconut ones for Dad because coconut is foul and gets stuck in your teeth and to the roof of your mouth.  Let's not talk about how I left the almond part of sorched almonds for him. 

Christmas day involved lunch with everyone around the family dining table, eating too much home grown roast lamb and the best pavlova in the world made by my Mum.  After lunch we all had a nap and then had leftovers for tea. 

Later on, when my siblings got married and had families of their own, it was traditional for us to spend Christmas Day at home, or with the in-laws, then we would all get together on Boxing Day.  It was an unwritten law.

That changed two years ago. 

Well, actually, four years ago was the last time we were all together on Boxing Day.  Three years ago Chyken and I spent Christmas in England.  We spent Christmas Eve in York and Christmas Day having lunch with his extended family, including his Grandma.  Despite me holding out hope until 11:50pm, it didn't snow, however I did see my first and only squirrel that day.  We spent Boxing Day in front of a fire in a 300 year old barn that had been converted in to a house.  Different, but still involving family, and we had celebrated Christmas with our Australian families earlier in December.

Two years ago we had our usual Boxing Day thing, but my Dad wasn't there, he was in hospital.  The rest of us had lunch and made plans to do it all again when Dad came out of hospital. 

Dad didn't come out of hospital. 

We never had a 'proper' Christmas that year. 

I doubt we will again.


  1. Christmas can be the best time of year when you have family to share it with, or the worst time of year when that family is no longer there and everything changes. So sorry Christmas has changed in this sad way for you. I could suggest that with time new traditions will emerge that won't be the same as what you had but will have their own warmth. I could suggest that but you're not likely to believe me until it happens and it may happen very gradually. xXHUGSXx

  2. Wow that's a little sad!

    We are in Darwin so it doesn't feel like Christmas unless it's raining. One year we went to Adelaide as kids, and I didn't want to get out of bed Christmas morning caue it didn't feel right.

    By the way your link didn't work on IBOT. I had to google you to find it!

  3. I'm so sorry for your loss. It must be so hard. xx

  4. I'm so sorry you suffered such a devastating loss xx

  5. So sorry for your loss. I know how entire families can change when someone so pivotal is gone. It happened in my family when my Chinese grandma passed away. The entire huge and extended family would always be at her place for Chinese New Year celebrations. When she passed, the many year tradition abruptly stopped and everyone pretty much went their own way. Eventually, some have made new traditions with their own family and the young ones are none the widser, but it is still sad for our generation.

  6. So sad honey! It's hard to not have family around at this time of the year. I know because it's the same for me. I miss them terribly and it was hard to let go of Christmas with my parents and siblings. Having said that, I'm also enjoying starting new traditions and memories with MY little family now. No doubt one day my kids will get married and move on too. And they'll create their new Christmas traditions. Circle of life. Or circle of Christmas traditions.

  7. I'm so sorry to hear that :( I remember the first Christmas after my Nanna died that it just didn't feel the same without a phone call from her, a Christmas card with $50 and a Lion's Christmas cake. To this day, I still buy Lion's Christmas cakes every year. Not only are they the best ones ever! but they remind me of her too.

  8. Hi Jo,
    I know how you feel, as you know, my dad passed away just before christmas 2 years ago, christmas was his favourite time of the year, and the last couple have been hard. I want to have Christmas again, family, friends enjoy, celebrate it like dad would want us to and my plan this Christmas is to do that. It will be 3 years then since he has gone. It is like Easter, it is mum's favourite time of the year and she died last year just before Easter... I don't know how I will be this year, it has snuck up on me and even though Easter is a bit earlier than it was last year, I will be going to NSW for this. Life sucks big time sometimes and I do try to smile, I do try to laugh, but sometimes all I want is my mum or my dad. I know they are always with me in my heart in my memory. Just darn it, it isn't enough some days
    hugssss and love xxxxxx
    Kayles aka Kayleen

  9. That doesn't read right, I won't be in NSW for easter but a week or so later for the anniversary of mum's passing,


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